Saturday, January 14, 2012

The Curious Incident of the Black Dog, the Bug, and the Yoga Mat

So, Thursday was a gift from Mother Nature to all of us teachers & students in my district, a much coveted (and greatly hated once June rolls around) Snow Day!  I woke up early, just to check the cancellations online, and spoiled myself by sleeping in.  Although, I really wasn't able to because I was so excited about the snow day.

So, I decided to be productive and tackled a MOUNTAIN of laundry, mostly Kev's work clothes... a mountain, I'm serious, I've hiked smaller mountains than this enormous pile of carhartt work pants and t-shirts!  When that was done, I cleaned up the house a bit, and then decided it was time to try and commit to it... yoga (insert dramatic music here).  I have such respect for people who have committed themselves to developing their yoga practice & talent.  I, however, cannot claim to be one of them, about as far from it as humanly possible actually.  I tried a few classes with my good friend a few years ago and being stubborn, I didn't go back because I didn't master it on the first try... tricky little behavior trait of mine, I know... I'll work on in, someday (slight procrastination tone).  Even though I haven't committed to yoga yet, I really would like to one day, so I decided pregnancy would be the perfect time to give it an honest effort, both for my health and that of this little baby growing inside me.  So, while Christmas shopping with my sister, I picked up this handy little prenatal yoga DVD and just plopped it in on Thursday, please don't count the days that have passed since I bought it. :)

Anyway, moving right along... I put said DVD into the player and heard the soft music and saw the peaceful images of lotus flowers and running streams and tried to be mature, honestly, I did.  I don't know why, but this stuff does not make me feel peaceful and I kinda just want to laugh. (Yoga super stars, bear with me)  I feel way more at peace in my kayak on the lake or hiking Mount Katahdin alone.  BUT, I said I was going to give this an honest effort.  So, I took a deep breath and the yoga began.  I was doing okay... At one point I felt that surely I must look like this:

When in all actuality, I must have looked much more like this, but hey, I love dogs so it's all good :)
Self-criticism aside, I was doing pretty well and actually feeling great and almost enjoying myself when all heck broke loose.  My dog Bailey, all 100 pounds of 8 1/2 year old Black Lab/St. Bernard had been peacefully sleeping (on the coach, shamelessly with all four of her legs up in the air, snoring away like a buzz saw) when this yoga attempt began.  Once I got into my "yoga groove" if you can call it that, she decided to come join me on the very small floor space between the couch and the wood stove. Obviously I needed her intervention if I was resorting to yoga.  Obviously...

Oh great, I thought, here we go.  So Bailey is laying next to me, rhythmic yoga music is playing... I'm still trying to calm my mind, when... enter the biggest, weirdest looking bug you've ever seen inside a house in the winter time, which of course is crawling across the floor towards my yoga mat.  Seriously, this thing was huge, who knows, maybe it was trying to give me some yoga pointers?  I'll take all the help I can get!  Now, I don't mind bugs at all, I'm a tom boy at heart and crawly things don't offend me, I just don't really think they need to be in my house, on my yoga mat.  Well, Bailey the wonder dog apparently agreed because she decided to stand on my yoga mat (where I have my a$$ in the air in a very graceful downward dog) and is staring down at this bug with her huge ears flopping down.  The whole thing is so hilarious, just close your eyes and picture it... I dare ya!  I am listening to the peaceful music, watching three women in various stages of pregnancy look far more graceful than I do in their yoga poses (including the woman in her 9th month) and laughing so hard my downward dog comes crashing to the floor, nearly on top of my dog who is barking at a gigantic bug crawling across the floor.  

Long story short, even if yoga didn't occur in the purest sense, I tried and I think my laughter was really good medicine for me, the baby, the dog, and maybe even the bug.  Unfortunately, the bug eventually met it's demise when Bailey inadvertently stepped on it.  All in all, it made for a pretty funny memory.  Lesson learned, kick the dog out of the room before I attempt yoga again.  

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